Simple answers to complex questions...

"My invention can detect human stupidity. It has a very simple interface. All I do is point it at people."
"Then what does it do?"
"Why would it need to do anything else?"
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"Those of you that think they know everything, are very annoying to those of us that actually do"
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Ignorance is bliss, and their last name is ironic...
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What is the difference between the beginning and the end? Turn around...
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What did the spider say to Little Miss Muffett that scared her away? Don't eat that your gonna get fat...
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Dance like no one is watching... unless you choose to dance naked, then someone will be.
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ADD and ADHD is a cop out for being rude, lazy, and stupid. And so what is your excuse?
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Is everything ok? (sarcastically asked) Well, it was until you opened your mouth and proved what a jerk I thought you were to begin with...
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Open mouth, insert foot, oh wait, if I do that then where do I put my shoes?
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Too many men, Too many shoes, Too many... who decides what's too many?
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If you have an apple, an orange and a banana, what do you have? A bowl of fruit but without the bowl...
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Chuckle, chuckle, giggle, giggle, honk, honk, snort, snort, and that was just because Craig Furgeson has a snake cup...
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If getting married is a choice, I need to determine what my options are again...
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I'm heading south for the winter, parts of me have already gotten there.
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If politics are what rules the world, who rules the politics? Right, the ones who are out of this world...
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If you loose your mind, do you know it?
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Unique, different, special, and a wonder... traits of an ASD'r and those that invented the light bulb, the airplane, painted the Sistine Chapel, and created a universal language called DOS.
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If you grow up, does that mean that you have to act it too?
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Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday. ~ George Carlin
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"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." ~ Dr. Seuss

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"If you change the way you look at things -- the things you look at change" ~ Dr. Wayne Dyer (The Power of Intention)

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"Is is tomorrow yet?" - a 3-year-old
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"Focus on remedies, not faults." - Jack Nicklaus

**"If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away." Henry David Thoreau
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